Baby, I've got something to tell you..

[naija_pikin]

**This forum needs some serious resuscitation. I'm going to bum off certain topics that I've either participated in or merely observed elsewhere, because some of them spark interesting discussion. I'll fill up this forum with empty threads if I have to, gosh darned it!**

Secrets within relationships are apparently a tricky issue. Some people are vocal proponents of the 100% honesty policy....that is, until you mention that it involves sharing things that were not necessarily asked about, but that one is purposely withholding. Things like how X slept with one of Y's friends some time ago, and even though it was before the relationship, X knows that Y would react negatively to that little nugget. Or perhaps Y was only one of many on rotation until he/she felt that they should take it to the next level. What he/she doesn't know won't hurt him/her, right?

What is your stance on the issue? Are lies of omission relevant to you, or do you operate under the don't ask don't tell policy? Are there some things that just shouldn't be discussed with a significant other? Discutons.

[laco]

Is there really anything like 100% honesty policy?

[______]

If you know that when they find out it will upset them.. tell them first . Not always the easiest thing but its best. If you had a relationship with her friend she is bound to find out and if you have not stopped being in contact with her friend it just won't look good when she does find out

[naija_pikin]

Originally Posted by laco

Is there really anything like 100% honesty policy?

Probably not, but some people are big proponents of being completely honest about everything that comes up. Whether or not it actually happens that way is another story. I'm a fan of the concept, generally speaking.

Originally Posted by ______

If you know that when they find out it will upset them.. tell them first . Not always the easiest thing but its best. If you had a relationship with her friend she is bound to find out and if you are stopped in contact with her friend it just won't look good when she does find out

True story. If they can't handle it, then it's too bad. You win some, you lose some. Better to find someone who'll be cool with whatever it is from the get-go rather than to build something with someone who won't, and then lose it all when the truth comes to light.