06-14-2009, 06:53 PM
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#1 (permalink)
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Oga Sir
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: 127.0.0.1
Posts: 23,437
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Cheating
My fam and I got into an argument about cheating. She was of the opinion that incidents of cheating shouldn't be the end of relationships/marriages. That folks need to turn their head away or work through it...I said, nope. Once and u done. Even if I cheated and u left me, I would prolly man it up as my fault and keep it pushing.
Wut do u honestly think? Would u be able to handle ur SO cheating on one occasion or more than once? Would u work thru it or call it quits at a certain point or ASAP?
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"And I hope that five years and 10 years from now, I'll be a better man, a more mature man, a wiser man, a more humble man and a more spirited man to serve the good of my people and the good of humanity."~ Louis Farrakhan
http://seeds-of-thought.blogspot.com/
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06-14-2009, 08:20 PM
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#2 (permalink)
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Femme Fatale
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Dans tes rêves
Posts: 28,751
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Depending on how strong my feelings are and the state of the relationship, a lone offense could be forgivable. Beyond that, I'd be playing myself for a fool.
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06-14-2009, 09:59 PM
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#3 (permalink)
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MINISTER OF YABBIOLOGY
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Washington DC/BARIGA MAYORAL VILLA!
Posts: 16,308
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..UN...forgiveable....
Pa
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06-15-2009, 02:17 PM
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#4 (permalink)
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The Black Rose
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: "Deal with the faults of others as gently as with your own".__Chinese Proverb
Posts: 12,401
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my close friend recently ended her engagement ww. her fiance when she found out he cheated on her the 2nd time...kudos 2 her. she shudda ended it the 1st time tho...but @least, she dint lie to herself by gooiin on w. the marriage. i commend her for. a marriage dat was barely 2months away! wow!!!! i am so proud of her
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Res ipsa loquitur
The beginning of love is to let those we love
be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them with
our own image - otherwise, we love only the
reflection of ourselves we find in them.
Love comes to those who still hope, even
though they've been disappointed, to those who
still believe, even though they've been betrayed,
to those who still love, even though they've been hurt before.
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06-15-2009, 05:50 PM
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#5 (permalink)
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Oga Sir
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: 127.0.0.1
Posts: 23,437
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Originally Posted by naija_pikin
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Depending on how strong my feelings are and the state of the relationship, a lone offense could be forgivable. Beyond that, I'd be playing myself for a fool.
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I have a question, assuming u are knee deep with the dude and u think its mutual as well and he cheats...wouldnt u be inclined to be less forgiving?
__________________
"And I hope that five years and 10 years from now, I'll be a better man, a more mature man, a wiser man, a more humble man and a more spirited man to serve the good of my people and the good of humanity."~ Louis Farrakhan
http://seeds-of-thought.blogspot.com/
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06-15-2009, 05:56 PM
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#6 (permalink)
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Registered User
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 7,342
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yes, because it's never just once, forgive someone like that and they'll think it's license to do it again
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06-15-2009, 06:06 PM
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#7 (permalink)
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Femme Fatale
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Dans tes rêves
Posts: 28,751
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Originally Posted by Boss
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I have a question, assuming u are knee deep with the dude and u think its mutual as well and he cheats...wouldnt u be inclined to be less forgiving?
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The heart doesn't usually work according to those mathematics. Ultimately, I'd be inclined to end it either way.. but stronger feelings would be the thing to push me to give it one more shot. It could go either way, but I'd be more likely to forgive someone I really like than someone who I like, but who never really had me sprung.
The 'cheating' itself would be looked at in terms of circumstances, etc. If dude just decided he felt like tapping some chick for heck of it.. then yeah, bye. If it were slightly more complicated somehow (I can't quite think of anything at the mo), then I'd give it more thought. My immediate reaction would not be a good one though, that's for certain.
Last edited by naija_pikin; 06-15-2009 at 06:09 PM.
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06-15-2009, 08:42 PM
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#8 (permalink)
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The Nigerian Nightmare
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Somewhere...Dont know where exactly....But somewhere.....could be anywhere....definitely not everywhere...But somewhere.
Posts: 18,216
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Originally Posted by naija_pikin
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The heart doesn't usually work according to those mathematics. Ultimately, I'd be inclined to end it either way.. but stronger feelings would be the thing to push me to give it one more shot. It could go either way, but I'd be more likely to forgive someone I really like than someone who I like, but who never really had me sprung.
The 'cheating' itself would be looked at in terms of circumstances, etc. If dude just decided he felt like tapping some chick for heck of it.. then yeah, bye. If it were slightly more complicated somehow (I can't quite think of anything at the mo), then I'd give it more thought. My immediate reaction would not be a good one though, that's for certain.
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1) If dude's got u sprung, then it's more forgivable?
2) How about if he had a full fledged side chick while he was dating u? Or how about if u were the side chick and u didnt know?
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NR .com Characters Welcome
"They coming for me, wan' see me fall
U know my story, I been through it all
Nights I felt like dyin’, but I ain’t cryin’
What didn’t kill me, made me strong as iron..."~Jay-Z
Killin y'all niggaz on that lyrical shit
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06-15-2009, 09:59 PM
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#9 (permalink)
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Femme Fatale
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Dans tes rêves
Posts: 28,751
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Originally Posted by crAzy Don
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1) If dude's got u sprung, then it's more forgivable?
2) How about if he had a full fledged side chick while he was dating u? Or how about if u were the side chick and u didnt know?
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The chances of someone forgiving another is greater when feelings are stronger. It's not rocket science. Common sense dictates that you'd be more inclined to forgive your best friend for a slip-up than you would be a 'passing' friend/acquaintance. It doesn't mean that the act is more forgivable, it means that you would be more likely to forgive the person. You could also feel the exact same way for two people and forgive one but not the other based on other variables.
Both are grounds for automatic dismissal.
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06-17-2009, 10:01 PM
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#10 (permalink)
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Where?
Posts: 68
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Understand:
Everyday is a Naija party, there's jollof rice with goat meat, shirmp flied lice, and pounded yam with egusi veggie, et al et al...but everyonce in a while, a different party is required, maybe once a year nau! Haba! As such, I must turn to Chinese, Indian buffae or fast foods.
See burger king commerical for visual example. It's not cheating if your diet requires variety.
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The Chick Magnet!
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06-18-2009, 10:30 AM
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#11 (permalink)
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 3,294
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I think in a marriage cheating can be forgivable if it happens once and if you can truly forgive. I personally don't believe that people can truly forgive and forget that kind of stuff.
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07-02-2009, 01:49 PM
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#12 (permalink)
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BABA iBEJI
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: ******
Posts: 10,177
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Cheating is bad. opari...next topic 
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07-16-2009, 01:48 AM
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#13 (permalink)
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: God knows
Posts: 4,181
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once a cheater always a cheater.. i feel bad for this girl I dont know.. what I know is that her man is cheating on her... and he will propose to her and she will say yes... and I know its sad though.. ummm
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--- I love you Daddy but God loves you more..."Sun re o" ---
I need more time, I need more money, I need more understanding, I need more advice, I need more love, I need another chance, an open hand I need more grace and a pretty face I need security, stablility I need more space, and I need more sleep. I want the happinenss not tears.. truth not lies, pleasure not pain, sunshine not rainAnd what this all comes down to is I need Him...
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07-16-2009, 04:30 PM
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#14 (permalink)
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Registered User
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: IN YUR ROOM AND I SLEEP ON YUR BED... IT FEELS GOOD.... SLEEPIN WITH YU....
Posts: 3,943
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DID U ASK HIM/HER 21 QUESTION... BEFORE U STARTED TO DATING.
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Originally Posted by ONELOVE-HEART
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Unlike any one else, I figured we would be together forever, but now it's like whatever. I count on time to bring us to unwine and dine. I loved when your hands ran gently down my spine. I will always remember that you were once mine.What we had i thought was an unbreakable bond, but hey just like everyone else said, it just wasn't going to last a lifetime. Maybe it was to good to be true but at one time all I wanted was for it to just be all about me and you
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07-16-2009, 05:43 PM
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#15 (permalink)
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: so you can follow me home eh!
Posts: 1,570
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its not cheating if u dont get caught.....thats why i use hookers...... they get paid, they catch no feelings.... and i bust a nut~
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pretty IMO opinion is when u have to put stuff together to make yourself attractive eg makeup, tight dress, fuck me pumps, BEAUTIFUL(not fine) is when you can be in flip flops and pata and still make me go DAMN!
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