i love you...not you...her.

[Boss]

"I have a few homegirls of mine...I'd pretty much say that if they were dudes, I'd call them my niggas. They've been with me every step of the way. My lowest of lows, my triumphs etc.Each time I talk to them, I tell them I love them. Now, this girl comes along, we go to school together, fly and all. But I'm not one of the brothers that catches a trip easy talkless of telling someone I don't love that I love her. But we are dating anyway. I like her, to say the least. She gives me problems, we fight, but that happens all the time.

One day, she catches one of her many fits...this time it's because of one girl I told that I love. It was a phone call i made on the patio and then I walk back into the living room, and then she asks me
"Who was that?"
"It's Stephanie, my friend from Jersey"
"I dont know her"
"Umm...I'm sure I've mentioned her before...'
"Why do you say you love her, and you don't say you love me"

Now, at this point, I'm thinking it's one of those trap questions girls put at me, guys know this is a thin line u walk on carefully...so I said

"It's not like that, I've known Steph since we were kids, she's been my nigga for a long time.."
"But you still haven't told me why you don't say you love me"

At this point, I smell a fight coming. I know best not to go ahead with the discussion or deviate from it, but I know she's going to keep on it so I pull a trick out of my sleeve
"I'm sure there are dudes in your life that you love but not neccesarily consider dating?"
"Yeh, my dad and my brother, but who is she? Why do you love her?"

I'm holding on to my nerves at this point

"She's like family, she's like my big sister...when she comes into town, I'd make sure you meet her"
"If we're still together, the way you be loving these other hoes..."

A vein was close to popping...

"What the fuck do you mean by that?"
"I dunno what you be doing behind my back"
"And if I had a hoe, I'd tell her, I love her right there outside so you can hear me?"

She almost came back with a rebuttal...but she kept quiet...she went into the kitchen, trying to stick some plates in the dishwasher...I heard her murmur

"I dunno where this relationship is going where you're saying you love these girls but you don't love me..."

I tried to walk over to give her a back hug, but she pushed me away and told me to leave her. No problem, went over to my seat, watched me some PTI.

But then, I started thinking...a lot of questions.What is her problem? Why wouldn't she accept the fact that I love Steph, but not her? I didn't say I don't love her, I'd have said I'm trying to, but that would not help matters. Why is she saying this too early in this relationship? Hell, it's not even really a relationship...in my mind that is. Why is she being a drama queen at this point? Maybe not her, but at the same time, a lot of girls are like this...so saying I want to cut this at this point might be a wrong decision because I feel this is too small a fight/problem to let go of someone like her. Maybe I should just let it slide and give her time to cool...maybe I'm too reasoning and should not even wander into that thought. I wonder why I didn't let my fury go when she called Steph a hoe...I wonder what steph would think when she finds out this girl called her a hoe? I told Steph about her, she likes the girl....I'm sure that'd change quickly."