Paranoi

[crAzy Don]

We were both new to the school. I was a transfer, she was a grad student. We met once in a dining hall. It was a nice discussion, didnt bother her for her number or anything coz I knew I'd bump into her again (PWI and all)...so I was not surprised when I saw her in the ISA meeting (Pretty much in that PWI, it was either u were white or other, if other, pretty much u are eligible for the ISA)
We talked, built a rapport and a joint hatred for the ISA....while we were still talking (not seriously though) she mentioned from time to time about how she doesn't trust men. She said she doesnt give them the benefit of the doubt, blablabla...and after everytime hearing this, I got sick of this and I told her "Maybe u need to find a good man"
"What are you suggesting?"
"What I said, you find a good man" I replied
"All you men are dogs, there are not too many good men out there...where are they?"
"Well, you are looking at one..."
She was about to make a retort...her mouth was open for a couple of seconds...then she turned and kept on working on the computer.
I didn't say much afterwards, just kept on with the ISA project we had to do...it was business as usual after that and we went home.
I thought of her the whole night, so I wrote on her wall to meet up at the computer lab for "Part 2" of the project, but I think I know her for a while...I think I was going to ask her out for dinner.

[eternity]

so did u eventually ask the babe out or did you just join her in her desperate call for attention and request to be spoiled??
More than likely it was part of her plot the whole time.

[Obiagéli]

...ok.

[Omodudu]

Crazy dondada! wey the rest of the story?

[Rotimi]

Originally Posted by eternity

so did u eventually ask the babe out or did you just join her in her desperate call for attention and request to be spoiled??
More than likely it was part of her plot the whole time.

I agree.....b4 I post another dejavu...

[Rotimi]

Actually, Don, I wouldn't have said anything to promote myself directly......

I really don't want to waste time convincing anyone or saving them from their, "closed eye" mentality......

I would have probably told her to keep her eyes open for a good guy....she might get lucky....

But, it seems you're smitten by this lil kitten so, it is obvious the lady has experience or is at least a good bluffer......cause actually, most guys do want that thing.... but on the same token, so do most girls......anyway, I wouldn't advice any moves on her, sexually that is.......refrain from jokes with sexual connotations or anything that might give her the impression that you're "just another guy"......ask her out.....if she accepts, take her to dinner....after which, take her home, hug her and g'night....surprise her by making sex a non factor......that will improve your sexual appeal in her eyes..and eventually, she will throw it at u.....

that is, if sex is ur end goal.....

[Boss]

I'm sorry, I even forgot I wrote about this on here.

Anyway,

so I was basically waiting for the memory of my faux pas to pass...unfortunately I remembered girls dont forget things so easily...but this girl took it quite differently...she was less fiesty @ me than she usually used to be...but at the same time, she was trying to be close, always caught her looking at me every now and often...I didn't make it obvious that I noticed though.

So one day, after our international students meeting, I asked her to join me for dinner. It wasn't a big deal, just me and her and like two other people just sitting chatting, then those two people left, then it was just the two of us,and we got to know ourselves better.

To tell the truth, I actually liked Lauren, she seemed serious, smart, mature, she knew what she wanted in life...I just got turned on by her. She told me she was a masters in psychology (the irony though), she wanted to work in a school or as a private counsellor...I liked it and everything. We both shared some things in common. I asked her out again, this time, asked her if it can be just the two of us, in a more distinguished place than the school dining hall and better clothing? She laughed and surprisingly, she agreed.

Now I held myself here, maybe coz I'm too used to being around these immature girls for a while now that I was phazed by a confident mature chick who knows what she wants and will not cause a hailstorm to get it...I had to get myself together and get into it, and we actually did well the first couple of months/3 months...then it happened.

I have quite a few platonic female friends, most of them dont stay in the same city with me, so each time I get to change to, I go visit them. One of them (I think I mentioned her...Chantel)...reminds me of Lauren or vice versa...both akata, very fiesty, but Chantel is more fiesty since she's older. I went to visit Chantel and we were hanging out, she was telling me about her guy drama and everything, and we just hung out in the mall...nothing to it. I came back home, called up Lauren, we hung out that night...and that was it, just a regular ass night...until a week later, Lauren calls me up like

"I thought I could trust you! I thought I could trust you!"
"What are you talking about?"
"What did you go do in Decatur?"
"I went to go see a friend"
"What friend was this? What did you do with this friend?"
"We just chilled and..."
"Chilled huh?! You fucking cheat"
"What the fuck are you talking about Laurie?"
"I heard about it, I heard you was with her in the mall and shit, and y'all went outside and went to the..."
"Hold up, Hold up...don't you know Chantel?"
"I don't know her like that nigga'
"Ok...well.."
"And I dont know if that old-ass sorry ass bitch is tryna steal my man from me..."
"We are just friends..."
"And if she is...shit's finna go down"
"Yo! Chill out!"
"What you mean, chill out?"
"Here's what I'm going to do, I'm going to drop the phone now, and until you chill out, I don't want to talk to you"
"Fine! I never trusted your bitch-ass anyway nigga!" She dropped the phone

To say I was perplexed was an understatement...I was angry and I had to call up another friend just to get me to relax...Lord knows what would have happened if I didn't make that phone call. It takes a lot to get under my skin like she did.

I didn't talk to her, I went for the meeting that month, she wasn't there, I saw her from a distance, I didn't even bother talking with her...I just left it alone. Until one day, it must have been after Oct 1, she called me to come over for dinner. I said no. I mean, I no wan die. But later on, she came to my place, She kinda apologized for acting out and said basically it's coz of the dudes she's been around that she doesn't trust dudes but she'd have to learn how to trust me...blablabla. I was like alright, told her how I was pissed...and she made amends..and we were good again. It just didn't ring a bell why she was so suddenly forgiving. Then I found out later on two things: 1) She did a lil investigation, now apparently one of her "girlfriends" saw me kiss Chantel on her head (which I won't deny I did...me and her are like bro/sis, she's my big sis)...but the other part of the story, the girl made up. Not surprising tho, I know this girl...she was the one trying to flirt with me once when Lauren was not around...the irony of the plot though...but I never told Lauren anyway, kept quiet about it. The second thing I found out (from Chantel) is someone was asking her about me in the church...apparently, I didn't know folks went that deep to investigate, but anyway...

[CoalcityDiva]

Damn! you need to stay away! Shes Damaged!

[Boss]

the part that broke the camel's back was when...ok, I'd give u a lil background.

I do my laundry with my fam to cut costs. So each time I'm @ their place, I'd just do my laundry with their washer/dryer and shit.

My aunt is a big bugger about the whole everybody put their whites together, so along with their underwear and shit, I'd put my own white tees and singlets. So it happened once (like always) I found my aunt's bra and my cousins' thong within my shege...it was funny to me so i said make I return it back to them...kept it on my bed that morning when I was sorting my clothes.

Lauren came in from the gym to my house, said she needed to freshen up before she goes to work...no probs. Then like 15 minutes later, she's shouting at me and calling me a cheat about the underwear on my bed.

First of all, i told her, if I was cheating on you, I wouldn't make it so obvious. I'd actually hide it and shit...she got mad that I was telling her what I'd do if I was cheating on her

"Second of all" I remember telling her "It's my fam's underwear that got mixed up"

I tried to laugh it off like it's funny, but she actually took it seriously, and busted out my house, and I was like what the hell? Alright no probs now...I'm done with her. Next thing, she calls me and tells me that my cousin is coming over to pick it up. Lauren comes to the house and just sits on my couch...not saying a word to me. My cousin comes up, and laughs it off coz my aunt's bra...is big, u know...and my cousin's thong...I mean, it's pretty obvious it was hers. So Lauren was looking at me all embarassed...i could see her light skin was turning red.

I was about to get angry and upset, so when my cousin left, I told Lauren to follow herself out of my apartment. She was misty-eyed leaving...it got to me for a minute...but the whole thing still made me angry...so I let her leave and I just decided it's over.

I texted her the next day that we should talk...she kept trying to avoid me but I was kinda persistent, so she agreed. We met at the student center...when I was about to tell her it's over...she stopped me mid-way and told me she "didn't trust" me and that she can't go along with this...
"It's not you, it's me...i just have a hard time trusting dudes coz of my history with y'all niggas, and I just want to let this go"

I was about to be pissed...but I let it go, I was the one who wanted to break up with her, but shit, I aint care. The end justifies the means. My nigga Wynn always said "I ain't no Mr RepairMan"...if folks have done you wrong in the past, please let it go before you go on to someone else...I've been hurt before...but you don't see me carrying the hurt to you I thought...but I let it go anyway, let her go on her way home.

In retrospect, I think I consider myself lucky, she didn't go violent like some of them other girls would and she was really a nice person with a nice heart...just that whole trust thing that I didn't like. She couldn't trust me, I don't think I'd go on with something if you can't trust me and it doesn't seem you ever will.

Then again, started making me reconsider about black american chicks...I don't think I'd seriously date anyone of them anymore...but I dont know how long I'd hold on to this feeling sha...but anyway.

That's my memoir.