confused, guys I need ur opinion...

Sooo Sweeet 3 · 03-05-2008, 11:42 AM

Ok, so i've been seeing this guy for a few (about 5+ months) months now and we just aren't as initmate as we use to be when things first started, but on the flip side, we connect so much more on other levels, we spend a good amount of time together, we have these great conversations about our past experiences, family and what we both want in the future, we go out together, we know each other's friends, we're still very touch touchy feeling with one another (even in public) and so on and so on. I know I'm busy and he's busy as well and I know he has alot of things going on in his head, but i'm just not sure what to make of the situation. he told me that sex was not that the most important thing at the moment and that he's trying to make plans for the future to ensure that he's set in the next couple of years... and i do appreciate that he's planning for the future and etc, but still on some level I just don't know what to think.
I know he cares and theres no doubt at all about that, he takes care of me when i'm sick or need something, and generally he does a good job of balancing spending time with me and hanging out with the guys... and although he usually set in his ways, he's compromising more to be more accomodating to me and meet me half way on things that we different opinions on... and he does this thing about talking about the future (which to be honest, kinda scares me)...

on the flip note, i haven't been a (semi-serious) relationship with someone for a while, so i'm not sure if this is the natural course of things, but thought i'd get some advice.

Boss · 03-05-2008, 08:53 PM

Women.

Stop thinking and go with the flow. He seems like a good guy

It's attempting to think that just fucks y'all up.

Icegold · 03-06-2008, 08:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boss

Women.

Stop thinking and go with the flow. He seems like a good guy

It's attempting to think that just fucks y'all up.

lmao...some wat true tho

jaces · 03-06-2008, 08:21 AM

Emm, so what's the problem???

naija_pikin · 03-06-2008, 08:25 AM

You sound like you have it pretty good. Don't overthink things, unless you're actually unhappy about something.

Sooo Sweeet 3 · 03-06-2008, 11:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boss

Women.

Stop thinking and go with the flow. He seems like a good guy

It's attempting to think that just fucks y'all up.

thanks... i think thats exactly what i needed to hear :-)....

**Eraser** · 03-06-2008, 12:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by naija_pikin

You sound like you have it pretty good. Don't overthink things, unless you're actually unhappy about something.

seconded

edo_angel · 03-06-2008, 09:41 PM

HE SOUNDS LIKE A GOOD GUY...ENJOY THE RELATIONSHIP...TOO BAD THERE IS NOT THAT MANY GUYS LIKE THIS OUT THERE

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sooo Sweeet 3

Ok, so i've been seeing this guy for a few (about 5+ months) months now and we just aren't as initmate as we use to be when things first started, but on the flip side, we connect so much more on other levels, we spend a good amount of time together, we have these great conversations about our past experiences, family and what we both want in the future, we go out together, we know each other's friends, we're still very touch touchy feeling with one another (even in public) and so on and so on. I know I'm busy and he's busy as well and I know he has alot of things going on in his head, but i'm just not sure what to make of the situation. he told me that sex was not that the most important thing at the moment and that he's trying to make plans for the future to ensure that he's set in the next couple of years... and i do appreciate that he's planning for the future and etc, but still on some level I just don't know what to think.
I know he cares and theres no doubt at all about that, he takes care of me when i'm sick or need something, and generally he does a good job of balancing spending time with me and hanging out with the guys... and although he usually set in his ways, he's compromising more to be more accomodating to me and meet me half way on things that we different opinions on... and he does this thing about talking about the future (which to be honest, kinda scares me)...

on the flip note, i haven't been a (semi-serious) relationship with someone for a while, so i'm not sure if this is the natural course of things, but thought i'd get some advice.

Clockwatcher · 03-07-2008, 12:18 AM

How does sex stop him from planning for the future?

He's planning to become a priest abi wetin?

BlueBeauty · 03-11-2008, 02:18 AM

im confused, why are you worried?

monblaze · 03-12-2008, 12:34 AM

umm so wat exactly is d problem??
i think u r jus scared cos errthang is going on so smoothly
kinda too good to be true
but i think u shld go wit d flow n at d same time watch ur back
cos wit guys u neva really kno.....

La Reine · 03-12-2008, 01:30 AM

Her problem is that the level of intimacy between them seems to be tapering off (hence the word 'intimate' is italicized in the first line of the post). She's wondering if this is the normal course that relationships take...

To answer the OP:
I don't think anybody but you is going to be able to say for sure what's going on (that is if you're completely honest with yourself and don't make excuses for him). With relationships it's better to just go with the flow...not put too much of your mind into it, like Boss said.

Uncle Sunday · 03-12-2008, 04:06 AM

The beginning of relationships typically experience the most intimacy. Yoru relationship is just maturing and you are beginning to appreciate each other past just intimacy. Na normal thing.

KabiYesi · 03-12-2008, 04:15 AM

Answer the following
1. Have you gained over 10lbs since you started seeing him?
2. Do you spend significant amount of time calling him/talking to him?
3. Are you a good lay?

1. If yes, join Bally's
2. If yes, switch it up a lil' bit. Give him the pleasure of missing you
3. If No, get some pornos, buy some books, watch Sue, talk to friends... etc etc. If Yes, get some pornos, buy some books, talk to friends. Send him dirty text messages, play sex games, grab his ass in a public place.... it works.

If none of these apply to you, then he's fucking someone else, and chances are, she does it better than you.

KabiYesi · 03-12-2008, 04:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Uncle Sunday

The beginning of relationships typically experience the most intimacy. Yoru relationship is just maturing and you are beginning to appreciate each other past just intimacy. Na normal thing.

bullshit, intimacy should not taper... perhaps the frequency of sex reduces after the novelty wears off, but if anything 5 month sex is much more intimate than 1 month sex.

03-05-2008, 11:42 AM	#1 (permalink)
Sooo Sweeet 3 Registered User Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: In My Own World... Posts: 121 Points: 1,867.20 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 1,867.20 Donate Rep Power: 0	confused, guys I need ur opinion... Ok, so i've been seeing this guy for a few (about 5+ months) months now and we just aren't as initmate as we use to be when things first started, but on the flip side, we connect so much more on other levels, we spend a good amount of time together, we have these great conversations about our past experiences, family and what we both want in the future, we go out together, we know each other's friends, we're still very touch touchy feeling with one another (even in public) and so on and so on. I know I'm busy and he's busy as well and I know he has alot of things going on in his head, but i'm just not sure what to make of the situation. he told me that sex was not that the most important thing at the moment and that he's trying to make plans for the future to ensure that he's set in the next couple of years... and i do appreciate that he's planning for the future and etc, but still on some level I just don't know what to think. I know he cares and theres no doubt at all about that, he takes care of me when i'm sick or need something, and generally he does a good job of balancing spending time with me and hanging out with the guys... and although he usually set in his ways, he's compromising more to be more accomodating to me and meet me half way on things that we different opinions on... and he does this thing about talking about the future (which to be honest, kinda scares me)... on the flip note, i haven't been a (semi-serious) relationship with someone for a while, so i'm not sure if this is the natural course of things, but thought i'd get some advice. __________________ Living life & enjoying it :-)...

03-05-2008, 08:53 PM	#2 (permalink)
Boss Oga Sir Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: 127.0.0.1 Posts: 29,318 Points: 1,110,358,347.39 Bank: 6,989,708,554.44 Total Points: 8,100,066,901.83 Donate Blog Entries: 2 Rep Power: 21347118	Women. Stop thinking and go with the flow. He seems like a good guy It's attempting to think that just fucks y'all up. __________________

03-07-2008, 12:18 AM	#9 (permalink)
Clockwatcher Omote Emevor Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Over the rainbow Posts: 21,229 Points: 77,130.39 Bank: 5,637,359,507.48 Total Points: 5,637,436,637.86 Donate Rep Power: 21474891	How does sex stop him from planning for the future? He's planning to become a priest abi wetin? __________________ NR is officially dead. ----- Pass me the salt... my head hurts! At the end of the day, it all comes down to money. Jdramas pwn kdramas... period. Forever loving: Coffee House. Michael Jackson comes in love. L.O.V.E! I dare to DAIR!

03-11-2008, 02:18 AM	#10 (permalink)
BlueBeauty Registered User Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: oblivion Posts: 4,635 Points: 3,600.00 Bank: 1,283,790.94 Total Points: 1,287,390.95 Donate Rep Power: 5603134	im confused, why are you worried? __________________ As the river choose his path, though the river's proud and strong, He will choose the smoothest course _ That's why rivers live so long. They're steady~ as the steady beating drums.

03-12-2008, 12:34 AM	#11 (permalink)
monblaze Registered User Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Lagos! Posts: 4,326 Points: 25,079.25 Bank: 762,134.91 Total Points: 787,214.16 Donate Rep Power: 21368018	umm so wat exactly is d problem?? i think u r jus scared cos errthang is going on so smoothly kinda too good to be true but i think u shld go wit d flow n at d same time watch ur back cos wit guys u neva really kno..... __________________ @monblaze StillBaby of NR #OccupyNigeria, its your country, take it into your own hands... Lol, i crack me up!!! http://www.naijaryders.com/forums/24...-proposed.html

03-06-2008, 08:21 AM	#4 (permalink)
jaces GRooVY Join Date: Nov 2003 Posts: 2,249 Points: 28,340.20 Bank: 8,566,978,635.60 Total Points: 8,567,006,975.80 Donate Rep Power: 3222059	Emm, so what's the problem???

03-06-2008, 08:25 AM	#5 (permalink)
naija_pikin Femme Fatale Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Dans tes rêves Posts: 29,829 Points: 0.00 Bank: 435,356,590,800.55 Total Points: 435,356,590,800.55 Donate Rep Power: 21474915	You sound like you have it pretty good. Don't overthink things, unless you're actually unhappy about something.

03-12-2008, 04:06 AM	#13 (permalink)
Uncle Sunday Captain Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Retirement Posts: 21,057 Points: 181,575.00 Bank: 848,419,240.83 Total Points: 848,600,815.83 Donate Rep Power: 21474900	The beginning of relationships typically experience the most intimacy. Yoru relationship is just maturing and you are beginning to appreciate each other past just intimacy. Na normal thing. __________________ "A small stone may only make a small ripple at first, but someday it will be a wave." -Wiegraf, FFT NR Tribalists, Religious Bigots, and Enemies of Progress: Your name Here? Beat the U.S. Financial Crisis

03-12-2008, 04:15 AM	#14 (permalink)
KabiYesi Registered User Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: PLAYAHATAS CLUB Posts: 576 Points: 1,200.00 Bank: 5,494.68 Total Points: 6,694.68 Donate Rep Power: 549602	Answer the following 1. Have you gained over 10lbs since you started seeing him? 2. Do you spend significant amount of time calling him/talking to him? 3. Are you a good lay? 1. If yes, join Bally's 2. If yes, switch it up a lil' bit. Give him the pleasure of missing you 3. If No, get some pornos, buy some books, watch Sue, talk to friends... etc etc. If Yes, get some pornos, buy some books, talk to friends. Send him dirty text messages, play sex games, grab his ass in a public place.... it works. If none of these apply to you, then he's fucking someone else, and chances are, she does it better than you.

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