For the christian ladies ..... (Letter to Future Husband)

[Cleopatra]

Got this from a blog: It blessed me and it will definitely bless you too..... Enjoy



I have yet many things to say unto you, but ye cannot bear them now (Jesus Christ - John 16:12).
Honey Kamungaz…

Lol. I told you, the shady names will continue and probably become shadier. I’m back. I yet have so many things to tell you, but you cannot handle them all right now…

I am really thinking of taking these letters to the next level, i.e. making them a blog, but I shall be still until I am certain God wants me to do it.

This is just an update, kind of, to let you know what has been going on since my last one. You will probably notice that I write these letters on the days that I struggle with the wonderful counterfeits of, well, you.

How are you? I still trust that God is keeping you wherever you are, and preparing you for our meeting. Moulding and teaching and encouraging you in this tough thing called life. I look at all the men that I know and think it somewhat impossible that you would be singled out to live separate from the trends of today, just for me, but I have learnt to believe God for impossible things. Perhaps you are not walking perfect, as Abraham did… perhaps you are living “la vida loca”, like I call it. I still pray for you, and I know that whatever the case, your destiny is in the care of the One that knows all things, and in that, I have peace. I know that because He has called me not to be unequally yoked, and because His Word does not return to Him void, the LORD will not bring you to me before drawing you to Himself.

I’ve grown immensely since the last letter, and that was only five months ago. School was rather hectic but I managed to finish, and now I am trying to figure out what to do - focus on my Masters or continue with my Associate's Degree and get another Bachelor's first. I’ve learnt many things and healed from more. God has corrected so many distorted perceptions that I had about myself, about friendship, about men, about you, and most importantly, about Him. I know for sure that He will not deny me any good thing, and He provides my needs according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

This whole keeping-myself-for-you thing is getting harder by the day and sometimes I think I shouldn’t have prayed for patience because I keep getting the urge to ask God to get you to hurry up and show up, already.

Wait, before I get into that, I have to share this… I used to look for you! (Cringe... I was actually a little shy, sharing that)… I used to look for you - isn’t that dodgy? I really did… until recently, I read properly the verse, “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD” (Prov 18:22). That means it’s you that’s supposed to do the looking and the finding… and all I have to do is sit pretty, live my life and be special and sparkle – after all, didn’t Jesus say to let our lights shine before men? Of course, on reading that verse, my analytical, dissector characteristics got me thinking about “finding” and how God uses specific words on purpose. He could have said, “Whoso bumpeth into a wife bumpeth into a good thing,” or “Whoso endeth up with a wife endeth up with a good thing”, but He inspired Solomon to say, “Whoso findeth…” and He did not say anything about "Whoso findeth a husband!"

Finding has got to do with looking, and I know that, because many times, I have misplaced my cellphone, and looked for it, and been unable to find it. It’s often a funny scene, something like this: I decide to send a text message, but cannot find my phone. Check my lap, my pockets if I'm wearing jeans, no phone. I look around the living room and kitchen, and go outside to all cars, and nothing. I go upstairs to my room and look everywhere. Nada. I end up getting down on all fours and looking under my bed, going into my closet and shaking the shoes I wore that day to see if the phone may have randomly fallen inside them, yanking my bed cover off the bed, grabbing my pillows and sliding my hand into the pillowcases to see if I accidentally put the phone there when I was half asleep (as happens many times), tossing the pillows on the floor… until someone calls me and I hear the phone ringing and find it in my handbag, or jacket pocket, or some other place.

Looking for a wife might be a little (or a lot) like looking for shoes, or jewelry. I love DSW because they have pretty, cost-effective designer shoes. When I first walked into one of their stores, I was overwhelmed… there were so many shoes! But still, to this day, every time I walk into a DSW, I will walk by the rows and rows of shoes until a fancy pair catches my eye and there is no way I can go home without it.

Also, I love Kmart gold and pearls. Kmart jewellery is mainly inexpensive. Once in a while a costly but stunning piece will catch my eye and I will be unable to leave the store without it.

One last example… today, my sister and I went to Adams Fairacre Farms in Poughkeepsie to look for flowers. Of course, I was only interested in finding orchids, but I was disappointed because I could not see any. I helped my sister look around for the roses she wanted for her garden and suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I saw this beautiful, peach-coloured orchid that stood tall in a pot. I loved it. I walked up to it and touched the petals and held the pot and cooed until my sister told me to stop making noise for the other shoppers. I could not afford it. But it was beautiful. It was almost heart-breaking to leave it at Adams.

I guess that’s the way it is with finding a good wife. You go past the rows and rows of shoes, the carats and carats of jewellery, and the pots and pots of plain-green and colourful, perennial and annual flowers, and your eyes and heart land on one pair, one gem, one pot that you must take home. Before you see it, you are alright, but the minute your eyes land on the prize, you must have it.

It makes me smile to think of myself as that kind of prize. And it is with that thought in mind that over the past few months, I have shaken off the various temptations that have come my way, the ones that have made sexual sin look so alluring and so “not-a-big-deal-y.” It is with that thought in mind that I have managed – sometimes not without a fight – to continue to keep myself for you.

“So what’s in it for you?” my friends used to ask. “You’ll keep yourself for a loser, and he will break your heart, and you’ll wonder why you never enjoyed this very important part of your life, and you’ll end up living in regret and bitterness.”

They didn’t get it – and neither did I, at some point. If I make it about me, I will never grow. If I make it about you, hubby dearest, I will put my life on hold, waiting for you to come along in some shining armour on some funky horse, to “complete” my sentence. That’s wrong. It’s about making it about God. I am enjoying this part of my life, and I agree that it is very important. Aside from doing important things like working on my career, I am building my relationship with my Father. Sometimes I think I am taking it to shady levels when, in the grocery store, I ask Him which tomato would be best for the nourishment and edification of Mama’s meal and the family at large. Hahaha! (I really ask Him random things like that - out loud, many times!) Getting to know Abba has the wonderful reward of me getting to know me. In His healing touch, He has taught me to recognize and shake off bitterness, and to trade any heaviness for His garment of praise. I have had a taste of regret and bitterness, and the irony is, it all came about in trying to “enjoy” this “very important” stage of my life, but with the wrong motives and with the wrong perspective. I am loving life right now… and my friends know it, and when I refused to heed their advice, and seemed unfazed by their way of life, many of them wanted to know the secret. I cannot give it to them, but I can tell them about the One Who can, and so I did, and they, too, are now enjoying every bit of a pure, clean, fulfilling life! Ain’t God good?

For a while after I wrote "the last one", no prayers seemed to work and it kept getting harder and harder and more frustrating. It was like the devil decided to spice up his crumbs a little more. The offers came more like I wanted them – men who were dashing and caring and had a clue about the Bible, but tried to twist scripture to get me to compromise. Crumbs. I wanted the entire cookie, the one who's been bashed in the eggs and kneaded in the flour and anointed in that touch of butter, and then put into the oven and heated for refining, so that the bad things are burnt up and the gold remains.

I did not want to ask the LORD to take away my feelings, because I know I will need them when I meet you. I did not want to be a boring and miserable Christian whose whole life was directed towards the day I meet you. I wanted and still desire to be a whole woman, who knows her worth is far above rubies, who lives her life to the full, but directs her energies towards God, not a man. I still fervently believe that there is no way to love another human being as they should be loved if I do not first love God.

I asked the LORD to teach me to pray… and now I am learning that I should not pray concerning me, my body, my desires, but concerning God’s will, to let it be about Him. I asked the LORD to let His Spirit dwell richly in me. I asked Him to set me apart as a temple and a vessel of honour unto good works, not for any man, but for Him. I asked Him to help me to treasure my body, not in my own warped human and vain way (for beauty is passing), but in the way that the LORD treasures it. I asked the LORD to give me a desire to please Him, and not my friends, any man, or even (lo and behold!) myself. And then I asked Him not to take away, but to momentarily silence any untimely longings, and to divert my attention towards things that give Him glory and edify me.

You know what, sweetness? I still know Whom I have believed, and I am still absolutely confident that He is able to keep that which I have committed to Him against that day. (2 Tim 1:12.) It’s hard, and with all the women around me rushing to move in with some men and sleep with others to get satisfaction in the here and now, it seems harder for me to hold on, but for you, and more importantly, for Christ, I will.

I write this for accountability, because my faith tells me you will read it one day. And on that day, I do not want it to be a lie. Like I said before, none of us is perfect, and I pray that we always remember that. I pray that when we meet, we are able to celebrate our differences and acknowledge that like the lock needs the key to open the door that leads to the room, we will need to work together to be able to discover the incredible heights we can scale in Christ. He has yet many things to tell us, but we cannot bear them now...

Fin! Another chunk of my mind, shared with you.

Prayer: LORD, please bless the man to whom this letter belongs. Please keep his heart close to yours, and open his eyes to see You, for You are the Light, but to a blind man, light is of no use. I ask that You bless him and keep him, and prosper him in every single thing he does, that every single thing he puts his hand to may be blessed, and that he would walk before You and be perfect and holy because that is what You have called him to do. Keep me for him, Abba, I cannot do it without You and You know I stopped pretending a long time ago - without You, I am hopeless and as good as dead. May the vision of Your reward for me be a source of strength in this battle against the flesh. In Christ's Name I humbly ask it.

[La Reine]

WOW! Thanks for posting this. Very inspirational!