Survival Guide: How to survive in naija - coming from abroad

djmightymike · 12-29-2006, 03:57 AM

There was this thread - "Arrived naija on the 23th, killed on 24th". I thought it was shamefully sad, so i was inspired to write this survival guide - offering my survival tips and welcoming more from ya'll based on your experience.

Listen very carefully and take a moment to let this sink in.
When you go back to naija, never never never argue with operation sweep. dont even try to argue like you know your rights and shit becos if you do, heh! if you try to show yoursef like "yeh i know my rights mehn, you can mess wiv me, my father is king kong, blah blah blah..." chei! you go suffer o! to put in yoruba " iya ma fe je e pa". They will just shoot your ass mehn, them police are like a gang yo,they dont give a fuck - simply put. But if you do sha, i pray to God you live to tell. One time sef police flog my yash for Mile two bustop becos i crossed the highway instead of using the overpass. And you know naijas are not used to overpass, we just run across the highways. Go to oshodi and see. Just be cool headed mehn, you're goin be the wiser one after everyting.

Just My 2 cents on how to survive for naija. A word is enuff for the wise

akuna_matete · 12-29-2006, 03:59 AM

jus go dia and appear like a brokeass . problem solved

12-29-2006, 04:11 AM

look raggedy but not too raggedy and make sure you arrange for pple to pick u up from airport and if ur accent is yankeefied blow pidgin at all times

Arinze · 12-29-2006, 04:15 AM

All this one na story.. Na God dey save person. If you like dress up like bum, if those ppl mean you dem go get you. End of story!

**MIprincess** · 12-29-2006, 04:15 AM

better act like u know "whats up"
certain places in Lagos for example, I had to do craze woman, area boy was like leave am sef, her wahala too much You dont say "excuse me, I'm tryin to get through", you say "comot jare make I pass" Pidgin is highly necessary on the streets.

Arinze · 12-29-2006, 04:19 AM

Yes ooo, like 2face talk.."soji urself". I am one dude that's extremely street smart, it helps when I am dealing with people in the market or trying to get certain services. I can't help that I drive a 'decent' car na.. haba make man no dey comfortable again?

There's really no formula to this madness, just hope and pray you ain't a victim.

Quote:

Originally Posted by MIprincess

better act like u know "whats up"
certain places in Lagos for example, I had to do craze woman, area boy was like leave am sef, her wahala too much You dont say "excuse me, I'm tryin to get through", you say "comot jare make I pass" Pidgin is highly necessary on the streets.

**Nene** · 12-29-2006, 04:21 AM

what kind of business man was the dude that got killed ?

akuna_matete · 12-29-2006, 04:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nene

what kind of business man was the dude that got killed ?

car slangin bidneez

**Deon Fernandez** · 12-29-2006, 04:23 AM

Just pray say make God dey watch over us....if its ur day...its your day, death go come....na so this man go naija from yankee escape almost 20 police checkpoint on his way from airport without any scratch but a few dollars......he reached home safe n' sound...but guess wetin kill am for the house...na so he go sleep on an old bed...wetin do am? Na bed-bugs suck hin blood finish b4 morrin.......next morrin, na only hin teeth dem take recognize am....dem don drink hin blood finish, chai!!......so forget all the survival guide......

.....odu p'oju!

**Nene** · 12-29-2006, 04:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by akuna_matete

car slangin bidneez

i hope say odu no dey involve

**Nene** · 12-29-2006, 04:27 AM

i remember one military dude wey dem kill in younger broda , the man bin come from abroad ask cabbie where go dey safe make im drop shit wey im bring from abroad , na so cabbie talk say im go drop am for po po station come pick am the next day. The next day no sign of the bobo po po don kill am share im property. Na so hin broda hear go kill all dem police wey dey involve , dem no know say dem bim mess with the wrong persin broda

akuna_matete · 12-29-2006, 04:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Deon Fernandez

Just pray say make God dey watch over us....if its ur day...its your day, death go come....na so this man go naija from yankee escape almost 20 police checkpoint on his way from airport without any scratch but a few dollars......he reached home safe n' sound...but guess wetin kill am for the house...na so he go sleep on an old bed...wetin do am? Na bed-bugs suck hin blood finish b4 morrin.......next morrin, na only hin teeth dem take recognize am....dem don drink hin blood finish, chai!!......so forget all the survival guide......

.....odu p'oju!

tru story?

akuna_matete · 12-29-2006, 04:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nene

i hope say odu no dey involve

mmmmm dunno sha, anyborry wey dey carry fleet of cars go naija mmmmmm fit be bidness man for yankee sha

OREO · 12-29-2006, 04:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Deon Fernandez

Just pray say make God dey watch over us....if its ur day...its your day, death go come....na so this man go naija from yankee escape almost 20 police checkpoint on his way from airport without any scratch but a few dollars......he reached home safe n' sound...but guess wetin kill am for the house...na so he go sleep on an old bed...wetin do am? Na bed-bugs suck hin blood finish b4 morrin.......next morrin, na only hin teeth dem take recognize am....dem don drink hin blood finish, chai!!......so forget all the survival guide......

.....odu p'oju!

wow....vivid imagination...

**Deon Fernandez** · 12-29-2006, 04:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by akuna_matete

tru story?

I don't think so.....my fingers just typed that crap

. Do you think its true.....do u know where it happened?

@OREO...what can I say...

12-29-2006, 03:57 AM	#1 (permalink)
djmightymike Registered User Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Festac Town Posts: 8,638 Points: 1,278,100,513.38 Bank: 0.02 Total Points: 1,278,100,513.40 Donate Rep Power: 21474865	Survival Guide: How to survive in naija - coming from abroad There was this thread - "Arrived naija on the 23th, killed on 24th". I thought it was shamefully sad, so i was inspired to write this survival guide - offering my survival tips and welcoming more from ya'll based on your experience. Listen very carefully and take a moment to let this sink in. When you go back to naija, never never never argue with operation sweep. dont even try to argue like you know your rights and shit becos if you do, heh! if you try to show yoursef like "yeh i know my rights mehn, you can mess wiv me, my father is king kong, blah blah blah..." chei! you go suffer o! to put in yoruba " iya ma fe je e pa". They will just shoot your ass mehn, them police are like a gang yo,they dont give a fuck - simply put. But if you do sha, i pray to God you live to tell. One time sef police flog my yash for Mile two bustop becos i crossed the highway instead of using the overpass. And you know naijas are not used to overpass, we just run across the highways. Go to oshodi and see. Just be cool headed mehn, you're goin be the wiser one after everyting. Just My 2 cents on how to survive for naija. A word is enuff for the wise __________________ The Lord is my Shepherd -Psalms 23 http://djmightymike.net http://truspotradio.com http://myspace.com/naijadjs http://myspace.com/dj_mightymike

12-29-2006, 04:15 AM	#4 (permalink)
Arinze New Lagos Join Date: Jul 2001 Posts: 29,364 Points: 39,162,376.45 Bank: 0.49 Total Points: 39,162,376.94 Donate Rep Power: 2470000000	All this one na story.. Na God dey save person. If you like dress up like bum, if those ppl mean you dem go get you. End of story! __________________ MEND Supporter

12-29-2006, 04:15 AM	#5 (permalink)
MIprincess Lolo I of Nibo Join Date: Apr 2002 Posts: 8,362 Points: 1,139.85 Bank: 98,835.64 Total Points: 99,975.49 Donate Rep Power: 13491	better act like u know "whats up" certain places in Lagos for example, I had to do craze woman, area boy was like leave am sef, her wahala too much You dont say "excuse me, I'm tryin to get through", you say "comot jare make I pass" Pidgin is highly necessary on the streets. __________________ Blessed by the Most High Need some inspiration? Check out Heartlight for powerful words "Ugo chara acha adi(ghi) echu echu"--Igbo proverb- The eagle never flies low. One that is well trained will stand the test of time/will endure. C'est Dieu qui donne la vie.

12-29-2006, 04:21 AM	#7 (permalink)
Nene Elder Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: where u least expect Posts: 12,139 Points: 20,018.20 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 20,018.20 Donate Rep Power: 1567154	what kind of business man was the dude that got killed ? __________________ uncool list : cool list: Dele,Tayo I JUST BELIEVE YOU HAVE TO TAKE LIFE BY THE REINS, AND ACT LIKE YOU MEAN BUSINESS

12-29-2006, 04:27 AM	#11 (permalink)
Nene Elder Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: where u least expect Posts: 12,139 Points: 20,018.20 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 20,018.20 Donate Rep Power: 1567154	i remember one military dude wey dem kill in younger broda , the man bin come from abroad ask cabbie where go dey safe make im drop shit wey im bring from abroad , na so cabbie talk say im go drop am for po po station come pick am the next day. The next day no sign of the bobo po po don kill am share im property. Na so hin broda hear go kill all dem police wey dey involve , dem no know say dem bim mess with the wrong persin broda __________________ uncool list : cool list: Dele,Tayo I JUST BELIEVE YOU HAVE TO TAKE LIFE BY THE REINS, AND ACT LIKE YOU MEAN BUSINESS

12-29-2006, 03:59 AM	#2 (permalink)
akuna_matete Registered User Join Date: May 2006 Location: peckham Posts: 6,013 Points: 33.00 Bank: 131,060.82 Total Points: 131,093.82 Donate Rep Power: 237270	jus go dia and appear like a brokeass . problem solved

12-29-2006, 04:11 AM	#3 (permalink)
TheBendelite Posts: n/a Points: 0 Bank: 0 Total Points: 0 Donate	look raggedy but not too raggedy and make sure you arrange for pple to pick u up from airport and if ur accent is yankeefied blow pidgin at all times

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