help!

yewie4u · 11-23-2005, 04:08 AM

been having some problems lately.seems to me that realtionships nowadays have one and only one purpose- to provide people with an excuseand a partner to have sex with. what happened to the idea of growing together, helping out,bringing out the best in the other person and ultimately planning a future to gather?
people tell me that i am old fashioned. but i seriously believe that there is more to a relationship than sex. most guys have met seem to think otherwise and when i find that out, i run for dear life!but it leaves me so heart broken.now i really feel there are no serious guys out there, all they really want is a fling.
what do i do?

11-27-2005, 03:16 AM

Dear Yewie4U,

This is a common problem that many people face. There is not one clear cut answer. All I can say is do you, without compromising your beliefs, morals and principles. If you choose not to have sex in the relationship, then do so. It's just going to be that much harder to find a guy who's willing to give up sex. But there are some out there.................I'm not sure where, but they're somewhere. Hold on my sister!

*DiamOnd* · 12-05-2005, 03:45 AM

well if there's much more to relationship than sex...then why do people break up when a guy/gurl goes and fucks some1 else..
plz b realistic...
relationships r 75% sex...
and the rest falls in..

crAzy Don · 12-05-2005, 01:04 PM

Yewie4u, if you are being totally honest, I do have a certain amount of respect for you, there are very few women like you, and likewise, there are very few men made for you.

And from my standpoint, a man that wants to have sex with you may or may not really have your best interests at heart...it's for you to decide and act accordingly. Because your boyfriend wants to have sex with you doesnt mean you should brush him off...that's just one thing I suggest you consider.

But for the most part, basically do what Mzz Nita advised...do you...don't compromise your principles.... just be steadfast and dont twitch under the influence of people (whoever they are) that see you as old-fashioned and all that other stuff. Your principles are your principles, not theirs...and please be realistic and compromising in ur cirteria/preference for a man, and someone would come along.

Good Luck.

12-05-2005, 04:58 PM

@ crazyDon: very well said. hmm, maybe we should campaign to be moderators of this forum together. it could be like a 'He said, She said' type of deal. there'd be answers with both male and female perspectives.................what do you think?

crAzy Don · 12-05-2005, 05:18 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mzz Nita
@ crazyDon: very well said. hmm, maybe we should campaign to be moderators of this forum together. it could be like a 'He said, She said' type of deal. there'd be answers with both male and female perspectives.................what do you think?

Yeh, I'd be down for that.

12-05-2005, 05:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by crAzy Don
Yeh, I'd be down for that.

cool, sounds like a plan. so how do we go about it? who do we notify of our interest?

crAzy Don · 12-05-2005, 05:32 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mzz Nita
cool, sounds like a plan. so how do we go about it? who do we notify of our interest?

I have a few ideas on the top of my head

As from now on, we'd keep it confined to PM's...if that's ok with u?

yewie4u · 12-08-2005, 01:41 AM

i dont believe am too choosy. am not the kind that goes for fine boys or rich boys.i have enough to keep me comfortable.i just want an ok person.someone who is cool and who will respect me in every sense of the word.
and talking of friends none of them can "corrupt" me.i know what i am doing and i always say that time is the only answer to who was right.

*~Aisha~* · 01-30-2006, 10:31 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by yewie4u
i dont believe am too choosy. am not the kind that goes for fine boys or rich boys.i have enough to keep me comfortable.i just want an ok person.someone who is cool and who will respect me in every sense of the word.
and talking of friends none of them can "corrupt" me.i know what i am doing and i always say that time is the only answer to who was right.

...and God.

Crazydon and MzzNIta, what happened to the plan?

01-31-2006, 04:51 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by *~Aisha~*
...and God.

Crazydon and MzzNIta, what happened to the plan?

the NR powers that be pretty much didn't care.......

in which case i say, then shut down the damn Dear Abi forum. it's just a waste of cyberspace. it seems ridiculous to me that ppl wanna help out, and they're not interested

*~Aisha~* · 01-31-2006, 06:39 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mzz Nita
the NR powers that be pretty much didn't care....... in which case i say, then shut down the damn Dear Abi forum. it's just a waste of cyberspace. it seems ridiculous to me that ppl wanna help out, and they're not interested

That's strange, did you talk to Bubus? He usually responds quickly.

**Thuggie Baby** · 02-03-2006, 06:44 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mzz Nita
the NR powers that be pretty much didn't care....... in which case i say, then shut down the damn Dear Abi forum. it's just a waste of cyberspace. it seems ridiculous to me that ppl wanna help out, and they're not interested

maybe it's becos we don't want your ridiculous advise

02-06-2006, 05:02 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by IhaveIssues
maybe it's becos we don't want your ridiculous advise

you mean adviCe. Advise is a verb meaning to give advice.

I suggest you try to work out your issues

**Thuggie Baby** · 02-08-2006, 01:43 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mzz Nita
you mean adviCe. Advise is a verb meaning to give advice.

I suggest you try to work out your issues

how about you help me work out my issues. You can start by helping me scratch my right boob

11-23-2005, 04:08 AM	#1 (permalink)
yewie4u Registered User Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: lagos,nigeria Posts: 22 Points: 4,278.85 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 4,278.85 Donate Rep Power: 0	help! been having some problems lately.seems to me that realtionships nowadays have one and only one purpose- to provide people with an excuseand a partner to have sex with. what happened to the idea of growing together, helping out,bringing out the best in the other person and ultimately planning a future to gather? people tell me that i am old fashioned. but i seriously believe that there is more to a relationship than sex. most guys have met seem to think otherwise and when i find that out, i run for dear life!but it leaves me so heart broken.now i really feel there are no serious guys out there, all they really want is a fling. what do i do? __________________ moi,

12-05-2005, 01:04 PM	#4 (permalink)
crAzy Don The Nigerian Nightmare Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Somewhere...Dont know where exactly....But somewhere.....could be anywhere....definitely not everywhere...But somewhere. Posts: 18,247 Points: 120,035.00 Bank: 0.02 Total Points: 120,035.02 Donate Rep Power: 21474887	Yewie4u, if you are being totally honest, I do have a certain amount of respect for you, there are very few women like you, and likewise, there are very few men made for you. And from my standpoint, a man that wants to have sex with you may or may not really have your best interests at heart...it's for you to decide and act accordingly. Because your boyfriend wants to have sex with you doesnt mean you should brush him off...that's just one thing I suggest you consider. But for the most part, basically do what Mzz Nita advised...do you...don't compromise your principles.... just be steadfast and dont twitch under the influence of people (whoever they are) that see you as old-fashioned and all that other stuff. Your principles are your principles, not theirs...and please be realistic and compromising in ur cirteria/preference for a man, and someone would come along. Good Luck. __________________ NR .com Characters Welcome "They coming for me, wan' see me fall U know my story, I been through it all Nights I felt like dyin’, but I ain’t cryin’ What didn’t kill me, made me strong as iron..."~Jay-Z Killin y'all niggaz on that lyrical shit Last edited by crAzy Don; 12-05-2005 at 01:08 PM..

12-08-2005, 01:41 AM	#9 (permalink)
yewie4u Registered User Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: lagos,nigeria Posts: 22 Points: 4,278.85 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 4,278.85 Donate Rep Power: 0	i dont believe am too choosy. am not the kind that goes for fine boys or rich boys.i have enough to keep me comfortable.i just want an ok person.someone who is cool and who will respect me in every sense of the word. and talking of friends none of them can "corrupt" me.i know what i am doing and i always say that time is the only answer to who was right. __________________ moi,

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11-27-2005, 03:16 AM	#2 (permalink)
Mzz Nita Posts: n/a Points: 0 Bank: 0 Total Points: 0 Donate	Dear Yewie4U, This is a common problem that many people face. There is not one clear cut answer. All I can say is do you, without compromising your beliefs, morals and principles. If you choose not to have sex in the relationship, then do so. It's just going to be that much harder to find a guy who's willing to give up sex. But there are some out there.................I'm not sure where, but they're somewhere. Hold on my sister!

12-05-2005, 04:58 PM	#5 (permalink)
Mzz Nita Posts: n/a Points: 0 Bank: 0 Total Points: 0 Donate	@ crazyDon: very well said. hmm, maybe we should campaign to be moderators of this forum together. it could be like a 'He said, She said' type of deal. there'd be answers with both male and female perspectives.................what do you think?

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